Archive for June, 2009

Michael Jackson, Celebrity, Talent and Self-Image

Saturday, June 27th, 2009

Michael Jackson’s life combined great success and talent with tragedy, loneliness, and a need for numerous plastic surgeries. Someone asked me to write a blog about this. I don’t want to comment on any particular personality or celebrity, but will make a few remarks regarding self-image, celebrity and success in general.

Fame is not a substitute for love. And talent alone will not make us happy if we have a poor self-image. Fans of celebrities sometimes project back to them the image or picture they see. This image may be very different from who the celebrity actually is as a person. Without a good sense of self the celebrity might even think that he or she is like the picture that the fans have in mind.

Enormous success, talent and fame can be difficult to handle without a positive and healthy self-image. Without a strong and positive self-picture celebrities might feel that they are not enough and then try to disprove it by pushing hard for perfection. It is beneficial to improve ourselves, but being driven to perfection can create a state of unhappiness, discontent and feelings of unworthiness.

Our society places a high value on outer trappings of success- money, fame, power, talent and appearance. It might seem to some people that these outer trappings would bring happiness and positive self-regard. And yet we have all witnessed celebrities and others who have “it all” and still do not feel good about themselves. They may actually be very lonely among thousands of fans, unhappy with who they are offstage, and push for perfection instead of enjoying realistic self-improvement.

For some people, no matter what they do or achieve it will never feel like enough. This is usually due to a poor self-image and a feeling of “I am not good enough as I am.” This can translate into a feeling of “I am not worthy of love and a truly successful and fulfilling life.”

Enormous outer success does not in and of itself help us to conquer our inner demons. I mentioned in a couple of other blogs on self-image that each of us must learn to manage our inner critic. Our life is meant to be a heroes’ journey and each of us must become like brave warriors who slay our inner dragons.

By embracing and accepting both our strengths and weaknesses we can make peace with ourselves. We can continue to improve without expecting to become perfect. This is a true form of success which can bring the happiness we are all seeking. Albert Schweitzer put it like this, “Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success.”

Cpyright 2009. Raymond Gerson

How to Enhance Your Self-image

Monday, June 22nd, 2009

Our inner critic is a major obstacle to experiencing a successful and fulfilling life. All of us hear the voice of this critic at times. It takes the form of inner dialog and negative self-talk. This is the voice that says, ” You can’t do it” or “You are not worthy of achieving your dreams”.

As we strengthen and improve our self-image we also diminish the power of our inner critic. This helps us to overcome our resistance (which is often at a sub-conscious level) to achieving our dreams. As our self-worth increases our limiting beliefs are changed into positive beliefs. We start believing in our worthiness and great potential.

What is something practical that we can do to enhance our self-image? Dr. Maltz, author of Psycho-cybernetics, asked people to go into the theater of their mind each day and play mental movies. Visualize yourself sitting in a theater looking at a large white screen. Then see yourself on the screen acting and feeling like the person you want to be. Also replay movies of yourself experiencing past successes. Our self-image is influenced more by pictures than words.

We become what we consistently contemplate upon. By frequently reliving your success experiences you reinforce an image of yourself as a successful person. Also, when you play mental movies of yourself acting as the person you want to become, you begin to see yourself in that way. We behave like the person we believe ourself to be. When you enhance your self-image, your life improves from inside-out. This is one of the great secrets for finding happiness and fulfillment.

Copyright 2009. Raymond Gerson

Using Your Dissatisfaction to Find Work That Matters

Monday, June 15th, 2009

One clue for discovering work that matters to you can be found by noticing your own dissatisfaction with problems you see in the world. Are there problems that invoke compassion for others? Do you see problems or needs that make you feel sad or angry? Is there a need you would like to fulfill if you had the power to make a difference?

Dissatisfaction can be positive if you use your discontentment to make a contribution. How can you use your talents and skills to help fill a need you see in the world? Aristotle put it this way, ” Where your talents and the needs of the world meet, there lies your vocation.”

Copyright 2009. Raymond Gerson